This weekend, in a very thought-provoking conversation that covered a variety of topics, I was asked how I managed to keep my relationships . . . so defined. In other words, how did thoughts of physical intimacy not invade the emotional intimacy I have with so many men who are most definitely in the unattainable list, i.e. gay or married.
I kinda liked my off the cuff answer. I'm sure lots of folks have great ethical explanations, but I really believe that this is what drives me:
I value the Creator, the creative process and all created things. A relationship between a husband and wife is a creation of sorts. Just as I would never take a brush to a piece of exhibited art, add a line to someone else's poem or a quote to a story, or push my fingers into a sculpture in clay fashioned by some other artist, I would never inject myself into someone's marriage or someone's lifestyle.
There's that . . . plus I already fear rejection enough. Why knowingly do something that is just asking for it? (And obviously that's more directed at the gay side of the equation, given that there's been a married man or two who might have embraced the idea, me and anything else offered up but who wants anyone that . . . well slimey. Let's just say I have better taste in married friends).